An underground fight club run by toddlers was discovered in the basement of a daycare center in Montreal.
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An underground fight club run by toddlers was discovered in the basement of a daycare center in Montreal.

According to authorities, the group of four-year-olds had been setting up fights between the daycare centre’s attendees, and were raking in thousands of dollars in illicit profits.

“We were tipped off by a concerned parent who noticed her child was coming home with an unusually large amount of cash,” said Detective Tim Donaldson. “Upon further investigation, we discovered an elaborate network of bribes and payouts happening right under our noses.”

The toddlers, who referred to themselves as the “Diaper Mafia,” were reportedly using their ill-gotten gains to purchase prescription drugs, weapons, and copious amounts of candy.

I don’t know how Tommy broke his arm in three places.

Unnamed Ringleader

The group’s ringleaders, who cannot be named due to their age, denied any wrongdoing when confronted by authorities. “We was just playing,” one of them later told reporters. “I don’t know how Tommy broke his arm in three places.”

In spite of their cute and innocent appearance, the toddlers are facing serious charges that might result in a lengthy prison term.

“This is a clear example of how even the youngest members of society are capable of corruption,” said Crown Prosecution Maria Rodriguez. “We must do everything in our power to stamp out this kind of illegal activity.”

In the wake of this scandal, parents are being advised to carefully monitor their children and report any suspicious behaviour or large amounts of cash to the authorities.

Photo by zoo_monkey on Unsplash (Edited by The Platypus)

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