Sam Oosterhoff, Ontario's youngest and most immature member of the legislature, has finally run out of people to block on Twitter.
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Sam Oosterhoff, Ontario's youngest and most immature member of the legislature, has finally run out of people to block on Twitter.

According to sources close to Oosterhoff, the MPP has been on a blocking spree since taking office back in 2018, blocking anyone who dares to question his political beliefs or point out his many inconsistencies. But, much to his dismay, he has now run out of accounts to block on Twitter.

“I can’t believe it,” Oosterhoff was quoted as saying. “I’ve blocked people and shut down legitimate conversations on Twitter for almost five years. But now, there’s just no one left to block. What am I supposed to do?”

Many have criticized Oosterhoff’s blocking habits, calling them immature and unprofessional. However, Oosterhoff defended his actions, saying, “I just can’t stand people who disagree with me. It’s a personal pet peeve. They want to make me look stupid but I won’t allow it.”

The MPP’s office has yet to comment, however sources say the MPP is currently looking into alternative forms of social media censorship, such as Instagram and TikTok. “He has to keep up with the times,” said one anonymous source. “It’s not enough for him to just block his constituents on Twitter when they can criticize him on a variety of other platforms.”

Some have suggested that Oosterhoff seek therapy to deal with his addiction to blocking people online. “It’s a serious issue,” said Dr. Jennifer Sarcosa, a leading expert on internet addiction. “It’s important for him to learn how to deal with criticism in a way that does not prevent constituents from contacting him.”

But Oosterhoff remains stubborn, refusing to give up his blocking ways. “I will not be defeated,” he said in a statement. “I will find more people to block, even if it means creating accounts on every single social media platform that exists to man!”

Tavis Nembhard, CC BY-SA 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons

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